Complicated Daze

So i guess i kinda need to explain that last post.
It goes like this.
Wednesday started off as a seemingly normal day, work 8-5.. then jenn and I had class from 6:30-9.. however we were bored out of our fucking minds and decided to leave at around 8ish. I suggested we go kill time at Square Victoria with a couple beers and my skateboard until the mini ramp was up at the bar. The thing about not having a penis and drinking beer is that when the iss feeling hits it's a little harder to release naw mean? Anyways luckily for us the W hotel is located right across the street and Jenn's uncle is the doorman so peeing is relativly hastle free. Point of that being that when jenn went to iss i decided to do a lap around the piece. I then heard a whistle, turned around..and it was none other than the bastard beast.

I made a rash decision to play the stupid american tourist card. Propably the dumbest thing i could have done considering they were french canadian pricks. Firstly, i fronted like i couldn't speak/ understand french(which deffinitly pissed them right the fuck off) then i told them i didnt know you couldn't skate here.. i just wandered out of my hotel and ended up there. They proceded to ask my name, age, address. Aw fuck i didn't want a ticket.. i figured i'd stick to my lame story and they'd let me off the hook... If only.
Anyways so i claimed to be a 16 year old sarah held from vermont. They then asked for parents names and the hotel room number... They called the hotel and obviously.. i nor my phony parents were listed. They then told me i would go to jail if i didn't find some piece of i.d. Jenn had returned from the pisser and was watching from a distance at this point... i then decided to fess up to the beast man and tell them my real name. As soon as he heard the words.. okay so i kinda lied, in a fury he got out of his car threw me up against the hood and before i knew it i was in handcuffs in the backseat of a police car with 2 douche bags telling me all about how fraud is a criminal offense and the slammer was my destination. Jenn ran up to the cop car once shit hit the fan and asked one of the cops nicely what was going down as she was clueless to the situation. The cop then told her to mind her own fucking buisness and to get out of there. Jen was pretty offended by his rude tude and decided to give it back to him. so at this point im trying to houdini my hands out of the cuffs while sticking my head to the window trying to figure out what the fuck was going on. Then i see jenn start ruffing up the cop pushing him, he got ruff back and called for shit loads of back up. Finally they managed to slam jenn against the hood of the car while she kept flailing her extra long limbs and screaming shit like "FUCK YOU YOU CROOKED FUCKING BASTARDS BAAAAAAH" i was trying to hold back from laughing at this point.. thinking this really fucking sucks.. but i guess atleast i'll have a friend with me in the slammer. they cuffed jenn and sat her outside on the curb while they ran our names. Backup arrived and the douchebag cops were there bragging to their other fucking pig pen friends saying shit like "aww ouais la petite pis ca blonde" which means we got her and her girlfriend.. then they just started clowning on us calling us lesbians and shit i'm like cool whatever i'd eat pussy before getting on a cops dick anyday. anyways on to the story. At this point the beer was kicking in and all i could think about was when i'd next be able to pee.

Now im thinking Jenn pushed a cop a couple of times no way shes not going to jail.. but no. Instead they wrote her up a 500$ ticket and sent her on her way. So the cops get back in the car and start driving me away as jenn attempted to chase the car down the block. I kept telling the officers i needed to pee, they kept telling me to fuck off basically. they drove me to the cop station and i was like sweet just fucking book me i need to fucking pee. like really bad. like i've never needed to pee before. They then explained that because i had no priors they wern't going to book but i was going to get 2 tickets and a criminal court case. Man they purposely took FOREVER to write up those tickets purposely lengthing my agony. i somehow mannage to undo my pants and told them if they didnt let me out to pee i would piss in their beloved car. The cop then told me that if i did that i would have to clean it up with my face. Considering his level of dickery i didn't want to take the chance that he was bluffing. They then let me out (still cuffed pants half off) and told me i could pee but would have to pay another 150 pissing in public ticket. fucking cunts. So i held on for dear life.. waiting for them to write up my tickets and mugshot dates and court dates ect. Once that was over i never ran so fast in my life fuckin mad dashed to the delta, and a single tear ran down my left cheek as i took the most satisfying piss of my life. It felt like a fucking moon landing. mission completed. I then proceeded to the bar to get really fucked up.
The end.